Sometimes I go back and read my old blogs (the ones on my MySpace in particular) and I remember the Dimple days, and how for several years that I thought it might be it for me. That the record store and all the nightmare that came with it was all I would have. I remember one instance in particular, when most of my close friends had quit, I told one of my co-workers that I would quit before I turned 25--the day before my 25th birthday if I had to--and that person laughed and said "Yeah, right. You know you're a lifer."
They were kidding, of course, but there was a part of it that was not a joke, and I knew that what they said--at least at that moment--was completely the truth.
I look back now and although I'm depressed I waited so long to get my life together, at the same time I'm not. I'm happy I experienced the record store: the laughter, the drinking, the friends, the love, the heartache...I'll never have experiences like that again, and they are a huge influence on me today.
But I cannot help but feel surprised that I was able to do it. To leave, two months before my 25th birthday, and I've not gone back. I never knew I had it in me to be so....well, I don't know the word, and I don't know if it exists, but whatever it is, it's good. Just remembering makes me feel good about myself.
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